Apr 04 2008
Dear Mr. Murphy
Mr. Murphy
Murphy’s Law Corporation
Universe, Universe
Dear Mr. Murphy,
Please understand I do value your worth. I realize you have a job to do that many would find unpleasant and I am quite sure you must take a certain amount of abuse over it that may, at times, not be warranted. Also, some would say we have to have downs so we know ups when they occur, but I do not agree. However, my agreement or not has no bearing on it, really, does it? For you will continue to do your job of making things go wrong for someone.
I do feel, though, the need to suggest you spread it out a bit more evenly across the universe.
Now, that is not saying that I selfishly want less visits from you, for, in reality, I probably am one of the lucky ones that you skip over at times. I mean you probably thought we were not worth the effort since so many times, the week you broke something, was the only week we had a few extra dollars to spend. There are many who seem to be at the receiving end much more often than I of your mischievousness, I mean, job. Your recent decision to ban the sale of our house for a ridiculous length of time has not yet stretched as long as that of many. HOWEVER, your causing the Santa Fe’s air conditioning to break on a Friday afternoon in South Freaking Florida when the dealers cannot take it in — on the very weekend we are going apartment hunting and heat being my worst enemy, I would say that was going too far, but, no, you also chose to do it the only year in the last 30 plus that Leon had to use our car for work all day long - and it is the only car we have. You know heat makes me sick and that Leon’s only chance to cool off after walking neighborhoods is to run the A/C a few minutes. How dare you stoop that low! His sweat may offend innocent people.
And did you have to pick the same time that our bed, an 18 inch high air mattress borrowed, sprung a leak? Lucky for you we have a smaller one of our own that we carried all the way from Washington because I can’t handle the new chemical smell. It is somewhere in this little apartment, so you screwed up on that little caper didn’t you? You thought we had nothing else to sleep on! (And don’t think about trying to influence Leon or our son into thinking it was my falling into bed at night that caused it, either. I have more excuses to prove that incorrect than you have ideas.)
You are on notice. I am requesting the entire known universe put in their heads that you have served your purpose well over the years and you want to retire. You will hear it so many times, you will make your retirement happen - with no replacement found!
Cordially yours,
Marcia
And don’t play “Mickey the Dunce” and ask Marcia, who? - You know.
3 responses so far
He sure gets around, does Mr. Murphy…I thought he spent all his time here. Maybe there’s more than one…ciao
rositta’s last blog post..One Year Ago
Poor Mr. Murphy…I think he just got his ass kicked to the curb! Well done! He’d better not come back either!
And I didn’t send him your way, either!
Matty’s last blog post..NOT ALL IT’S CRACKED UP TO BE!
Dear Marcia,
In the debate about Mr. Murphy and his propensity for bringing disaster to our live…in threes, I will agree that his retirement is long over due. However, it has come to me that we might do to him what we do to demons and other unwelcome entities. We will overcome his power. We will poke fun at him until he just gives up. I loved this blog.
Following this line of thinking I could have checked Snopes to see what they had to say. However, I knew that he would feel my interest and need to pay me a visit.
Incidentally, Murphy called me in Oregon last week but I recognized his number on my cell phone and did not answer. This made me very happy.
b
Dear Barbara:
I cannot tell you how much your letter made me smile. I have been thinking about you this week anyway. And appreciate the reminder that we should check our cell phone’s caller id more often!
And thank you for sharing your love of this post!
M
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